View profile

*Hand Clap* Me and You, Us Never Part

**soft hum in the background** Reunited, and it feels so good Reunited 'cause we understood There's o
February 18 · Issue #8 · View online
demi & brut
**soft hum in the background**
Reunited, and it feels so good
Reunited ‘cause we understood
There’s one perfect fit
And, sugar, this one is it
We both are so excited 'cause we’re reunited, hey, hey

Champagne, I've decided namaste with you.
Remember when I said I was only going to drink once a month? And then I said I was only going to send this newsletter once a month? Ok, let’s work together to erase that from your memory. Hold still.
Your girl was tripping. I probably meditated a little too many times that day, maybe I was in downward dog too long or perhaps I had some PMS emotions swirling around driving me mad. Whatever it was, I was surely talking out of my head. I need this little newsletter and champagne to help me celebrate, vent and share. How else will I advise people to stay away from these under eye gel pads and to pair fish tacos with champagne? Besides, this is the only safe place to get this important letter I’m working on proofread…
Me. Angry. Typing. I have things to say. I have unmet needs.
Hello Fine Restaurant Owner,
I enjoy visiting your lovely establishment and nibbling the delectable food from your exquisitely planned menu. Your staff is amazing. Though I have to mention that I really hate it when you guys try to seat me dead smack in the middle of the restaurant. I need a nice seat tucked away in the corner in case I need to grab the wall when I stand up. I’m sure there’s a direct correlation between my becoming a pescatarian and the fact that I get tipsy after one and a half drinks now. And trust me, those drinks do not mix well with the 4-inch heels I insist on wearing because, hello, it’s date night. But the real reason I’m writing today, dear restaurant owner, is because I need you guys to make an adjustment. When your polite waiter hands me the drink menu, I automatically scan for the “Sparkling Wines” section. I am thankful that your menu has that section, as some places commit the cardinal sin of omitting sparkling from their offerings. And while I do appreciate your thoughtfulness, I’m displeased with the selection. You only have one bubbly option, and it’s usually one of the two brands I already have on-hand at my house: La Marca or La Luca. I love both, but I need you to diversify your bonds. Offering one lonely prosecco ain’t it. It’s stressful, and it cramps the entire style of my dining experience. Now because I don’t like to complain unless I have a solution, I have a proposal: Put me on your payroll. I will tell you exactly what to buy. You can pay me in appetizers and sips. I will lead you in the right direction. If you ask me to. Truly, your Crisscrossed Highball is impressive. The Becherovka in it makes my heart flutter. But, let’s go a little crazy in 2019. Add some champagne to the menu, ok?
Always in Search of That Bubbly
The Champagne Times
In this week’s bubbly news:
Piper-Heidsieck Champagne gifted each best actor and actress Oscar nominee a bottle of Rare Le Secret. Each bottle is valued at $2,000. It’s times like this when I know I missed my true calling. I am meant to play the 2019 version of Dominique Deveraux. Hollywood, find me. I’m usually in my house doing face masks and pretending green beans are french fries.
An old study about champagne preventing memory loss is making its rounds on social media. If anything, champagne makes me forget things like where I put my *redacted*. #themorningafter.
I already said I really hate the idea of the Chambong because do you really need to chug your Champagne? Sadly, this restaurant disagrees with me.
Clink. Clink.
Where do I even begin?
Did you see Cardi’s performance at the Grammy’s? A Queen! Giving high praises to Alicia Keys because that two piano performance was everything. Tamar Braxton, sister of living legend Toni Braxton, became the first black woman to win Big Brother. Toni Morrison blessed us with a new release, “The Source of Self-Regard: Selected Essays, Speeches, and Meditations.” My fav Comedy Central girls are back for their final season. Raising my glass two times to this episode of Netflix’s reality show “Dating Around.” A stunning and pregnant Megan Markle is giving us looks, paying homage and teaching us how to pair colors for the spring. And I have to take a minute to toast to Sarayu Rao, lead actress on the series “I Feel Bad.” I’m going to feel really bad if the show gets cancelled because it’s so cute, brings all the culture, she’s a boss and Sarayu’s character wears the best brown-girl lip colors ever. And Beyonce just won’t get off our necks. That red lace Valentine’s Day number. Woo.
Sip to This
He means Jay Z. And Jay Z is already my forever president so, yes, I agree.
Kendrick Lamar told us to “pour up plenty of champagne,” so I’m happily adding his song, Poetic Justice to the demi & brut bubbly-inspired playlist this week.
Some Relatable Content
  • It’s winter so we have to go into overdrive to get proper hydration. Dry, itchy skin is not popping, so I’m using this in the shower (smells so yummy and does not make the tub slippery) and applying this afterwards.
  • Remember how I said Sarayu’s character has the best brown-girl lip colors? Well, some of those colors come from Morphe Brushes. I have this amazing creamy soft matte lip crayon in DND (do not disturb) and it’s my eternal mood.
  • We do not deserve the many nice things Kelis gave us and continues to give us
  • Obsessed with shopping The Sill and adding plants to various corners of my house. I am in deep prayer daily asking everyone listening to protect me as I try to keep my green beauties alive and thriving.
  • Reading this so I can stop getting harassed for taking “auntie selfies”
  • I’m here for high-neck ruffles, waist-cinchers and purple.
  • This week’s self care: these dark chocolate covered almonds from Target
  • Don’t touch my hair or fire me for my hair.
  • So excited to see the beta launch of this meditation app for women of color. The founder reached out pre-launch for some feedback and I was happy to chat about black women and meditation. You can test drive the app and experience a meditation or two with a few of my favorites teachers: JoAnna Hardy, Sebene Selassie and Ruth King. Excited to see what comes next!
Next week, let’s chat Louis Roederer Brut Premier and the Champagne-related toy that’s going to drive me insane this summer.
P.S. I’m always like “send me notes” and then I forget to check the demi & brut email account. I just saw your messages last week. And wow, you guys know how to make a girl feel loved. So thank you, truly, to anyone who has sent a little note. I appreciate you laughing at my silliness and your words of encouragement.
P.P.S. If you don’t get the subject line, I’m questioning if you’re *really* my people. Educate yourself, please.
demi & brut: Popping champagne and pop culture weekly. I guarantee gifs, a bubbly-inspired playlist and a few laughs. Contact Sheena: 21+ over, please.
Did you enjoy this issue?
If you don't want these updates anymore, please unsubscribe here
If you were forwarded this newsletter and you like it, you can subscribe here
Powered by Revue